The Dating Equation: A Recipe for Success

If you decided to read this article because you’re looking for an equation which will practically guarantee the outcome of your date, then this is just for you, because, there is no equation to a “successful” date.

Sure, there are things you can do which better your odds of having an enjoyable time but those things are typically common-sense.  Many people, especially men, buy into a specific method or formula for dating, such as pick-up lines, or dates with a scripted itinerary which are supposed to lead to a specific outcome.  If you do experience success while dating by these formulas, it’s probably more of a coincidence than a consequence of the formula.

If these scripts and pick-up lines give you the confidence to ask somebody on a date or a basic framework to build your dates around, then I think that is perfectly okay.  They act more like training wheels than being the actual bike itself.  Training wheels aren’t how you ride a bike but they can ultimately help you ride a bike without needing them.

As for myself, I’ve only ever found pick-up lines and scripted dates to seem artificial and takes the actual fun and vulnerable transparency and thrill out of dating!  And, typically, at least in my experience, the person we are interested in can see right through the artificial nature of these things.

I believe it’s ultimately better for you and a greater sign of self-respect and confidence to be honest when you date, to simply be yourself, and tell people how you feel and date them how you want to go on dates, without worrying about what the “experts” say you should or shouldn’t do.  Remember, I’ve talked about the danger of attaching expectations to our dates because it always detracts from the enjoyment of the experience and almost always undermines the outcome for which we are hoping!

As an alternative, I encourage you to let your dating be an outlet for self-expression and sharing who you are with other people.  This is ultimately, the most challenging but also the most rewarding because you’ll meet people who accept you for you and you’ll learn more about yourself and what you want in the process, regardless of the outcome!

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